O frischer Duft, o neuer Klang

its spring where i am, things are stirring, in big and small ways. i have been trying to go to bed early these days, but something keeps waking me up. a few days ago, i am not sure but i think it was a song. or the start of a song, and visuals, and ordering, structure.

i sort of hate and also love that i am a slave to inspiration. i am glad it wakes me up. i am glad i don't sleep through its call or try to ignore it, whenever i don't, which i am sure sometimes i do. i guess this is why a lot of people don't choose to be artists, why have your life as you want it to be disturbed , be held hostage by this immaterial ....feeling, thing, being? whim? parents live this way, with their babies, but a baby you can hold, babies are very material.... but to me, this thing can be really real, realer that real life sometimes, so i guess thats why i keep going. i sometimes feel like real life is too much getting in the way of this other, bigger life, that sometimes wakes me up when i feel like i should sleep.

i have been meeting with joey casio a little bit, and its been great! i love the way he thinks, the breadth of his interests, and i think some good things will come from it, already humbling toiling on a few things. already i am excited and inspired, so that right there seems like a great gift...

we have been talking about kwaito a bit, i've been loving it for the last couple years, turned on by my friend Spoek the house scene in south afrika is amazing, and has been for years and years, can't wait to go there for real and check it out....

also been into:

• MNDR
• ACTUALLY
• The Voices of East Harlem (esp their version of Run Shaker Life, and their slogan "WE KNOW WHO WE ARE AND WE ARE FREE"),
  
• REAL shaker hymns and songs (run shaker life is based on a shaker tune called Come Shaker life...many of the shaker songs rose spontaneously from followers, living their simple lives, and, shaking ...they thought god had both masculine and feminine aspects in it, and that the founder of their church, Sister Ann, was the second coming of god/christ, as the feminine aspect ...),
  
• ancient greek and roman music,
  
• this great CD from rome where this guy is playing stalactites in an ancient cave .... SONOROUS CAVERNS

the earthquake off chile, all the earthquakes and tsunamis, its hard to make sense of it. the earth is moving, the earth is trying to throw something off. i don't want to intellectualize and spiritualize people's real sufferings, i don't want to ignore it because i have things to do... how to keep your heart open (if you can let yourself feel pain, thats the good side of it, at least, is that its a sign that your heart is open) .... but keep going too...